I’d like to say a big thank-you to everyone who responded to my last blog post, everyone who has supported OH and I during this miscarriage in whatever way, and everyone who is thinking of us or praying for us in private. I really do appreciate this and for me it makes the difference between an intolerable situation, and a difficult one that I can get through.
When I wrote my last post, I was upset about a Facebook status that had only received one reply. I was feeling quite raw about this at the time and I may not have expressed myself clearly, so I want to say that it wasn’t meant to be accusatory. If you didn’t see the status or didn’t feel able to reply for whatever reason, please don’t feel that you have done something wrong. My pain had more to do with the general effects of grieving, and my frustration at the way miscarriage is often not acknowledged in our society, than with any feeling that specific people had let me down.
Many people have said that it is difficult to find the right words, that nothing they could say seems adequate for the situation. I want you to know that there are no ‘right’ words, but that anything along the lines of “I’m sorry for your loss” will be appreciated. There is probably no magical insight that can make it all better, but just hearing or being shown – it doesn’t have to be verbal – that people care helps me to get through this.
If you are thinking of or praying for us in private, but haven’t felt able to communicate this, I do still really appreciate your thoughts and prayers. It would be even better if you could reach out to me or OH in some way, but I do understand that some people are just not comfortable with that.
Again, thank you all so much, and I hope I haven’t seemed too ungrateful or unappreciative in my grief. x